Guilty Feelings...

Have you ever been at a point in your life when you just know that you should be incredibly happy yet you long for something new? I feel like I am that position right now.

An issue that I've struggled with the past couple years has been my relationship. It is simply crazy because I've been with the same guy since I was a sophomore in high school (I just started my junior year of college). He treats me absolutely wonderful and I should be immensely grateful for him and his family but I feel kind of trapped.

See, it has been almost five years. I feel... bored. Five years ago, I was fifteen. I had to listen to My Chemical Romance every single day. I wore red eyeshadow and failed at teasing my hair. Now, I am recently turned twenty. MCR is still a big part of my life but by no means do I rely on them half as much as I used to. I wear basically no makeup now- just eyeliner and you are lucky if I take a flat iron to my hair.

You see, back in February of 2008, the thing I wanted the most was for me to win this guy over and I did it! He left another girl for me. However now, I want to experience other things. Don't get me wrong, I love him. It's just the desire that I have to go out and meet new people keeps growing stronger and stronger.

I don't want to throw away this wonderful thing that I have but I don't want to turn 25 wishing that I had gone out there and tried new things. I don't want any 'what ifs'.

What if I would've met someone who is more like me now? What if I met a hopeless romantic guy which is what I've always wanted? What if I meet a guy who will actually tell me his feeling about me?

...what if I'm just psyching myself into this 'movie dream' and in route to living an exciting life, I lose the one thing that was right for me?

xo
V

It's me!

Shipping Woes

Remember how I said that I would occasionally have a personal post on here? Well, this is one of them.

Lately, I have had the worst luck with shopping online. This is a terrible problem because where I live, there are no great movie or music shops so I am CONSTANTLY ordering online.

Lets start from the beginning:

1. Back in May, I ordered Bleed American on vinyl. LIMITED EDITION REPRESSING. The post office lost package for a day. They got it to me a day late after making me stress out about it
2. Exactly a month ago I ordered two packages from Madina Lake that included autographed CDs made out to me and a limited deluxe vinyl signed that is no longer available. I haven't received any of those orders and we keep playing email tag with each other trying to figure out what is going on.
3. Lastly, I ordered a very expensive set- Charmed Complete Series Limited Deluxe Edition. I bought this shit off amazon and it said the condition was LIKE NEW. I actually got this package very fast but half the discs are scratched so deeply that they won't play. Yesterday, I had to ship the other back and now I must wait for a refund

UGH. I hate complaining like this online but I am just so frustrated and stressed out right now :/

Has anyone every had problems like these when ordering online?

Leaving it all behind;

a year ago, this was me when I got my job at Hastings.

Today, this is me before my last day of working there.

I don't give a fuck about that job anymore.

Everything went downhill when Rebecca left. 

Managers have favorites.

Communication is nonexistent.

Customers are ungrateful assholes.

It's basically, let's have everyone who does the least work make the most money, and I am done with that. I will no longer feel like shit on the morning that I have to work there.

I just really hope that I can get moved up at maurices...

part of me wishes that Hastings was still an amazing job.